Our Last Chance

Three years after getting married, we decided it was time to try for our first child. During the first year, we took things easy – no stress, no doctors. After all, no one starts out assuming that something might be wrong or that there might be a problem.

Then, in January 2009, we finally saw those long-awaited two lines on a pregnancy test. Our joy knew no bounds. I went to my first doctor’s appointment expecting to hear, “Congratulations, you’re pregnant,” but instead I heard, “There is no heartbeat. The pregnancy has stopped developing. Please go to the hospital.” There are no words to describe how I felt. My despair was overwhelming, and the hospital stay brought another trauma, as I was placed in a room with pregnant women.

That was when our fight for happiness – our fight for a child – truly began. We saw countless doctors recommended by friends, underwent an enormous number of tests and tried numerous treatments that were supposed to help. Every treatment that ended in failure only deepened our despair. If it hadn’t been for my husband’s support, I don’t know if I would have made it through. All those years of trying for a baby were an enormous test for our relationship – a test that, I can proudly say, we passed with flying colors. Although there were also moments when we wondered whether it made sense to keep fighting.

At one point, we decided that we needed a break from it all. No more doctors, no more tests. We simply couldn’t go on living like that. Our entire lives revolved around trying to have a baby, and we were exhausted.

There was always adoption. There were so many children who needed love, but… I would never be pregnant. I would never know what it felt like to have a little baby moving inside me. I would never proudly show off my growing belly. It may sound superficial, but I wanted it so desperately. We tried to come to terms with it, but it isn’t easy to simply tell yourself: STOP. IT’S OVER. There are other ways… After all, not everyone has to become a parent.

We took a year-long break from our struggle, until some friends came to visit us. Like us, they had been trying to have a baby for many years. One look at them and I immediately knew… THEY WERE GOING TO BE PARENTS OF TWINS! I was incredibly happy for them, but at the same time, I couldn’t help feeling envious.

They were the ones who told us about Klinika Bocian in faraway Białystok – for us, practically the other end of Poland. We made our decision… We were going. If it had worked for them, why couldn’t it work for us? It turned out to be the best decision of our lives.

At our first appointment, we met Dr Mrugacz. He reviewed our treatment history and ordered several tests. Based on the results, he told us that IVF was the only option that could give us what we wanted so desperately. We decided that we would fight one last time.

After completing all the necessary formalities, we travelled to Białystok to begin the procedure. Eight eggs were retrieved, four of which were successfully fertilized.

After each embryo transfer, when the beta-hCG test 14 days later showed promising results and the levels continued to rise, our hope grew too. Maybe this time it would finally work. Unfortunately, the first three attempts were unsuccessful. We were emotionally exhausted and close to depression.

Then someone kind said something beautiful to me: “I know you’re sad, but I’m convinced that your baby is the one still waiting in the freezer. I have this theory that you’re meant to have this one child – the doctor just transferred the embryos in the wrong order.”

And you know what? It turned out to be true.

Our last embryo. Our last chance to have a baby. IT WORKED.

Of course, the entire pregnancy brought us immense joy, but also tremendous fear. Would everything work out this time? Would our baby be healthy? Would I carry the pregnancy to term? Under the care of Dr Adamczyk, everything went perfectly.

Our happiness came into the world on November 28, 2017, after 10 long years of trying.

Our happiness has a name: Franciszek.

The message we would like to share through our story is this: NEVER GIVE UP. KEEP FIGHTING UNTIL YOU REACH YOUR HAPPY ENDING.

You have to believe that eventually, just like us, you will find wonderful people like the midwives, nurses and doctors at Klinika Bocian. Dr Mrugacz, Dr Pietrzycki and Dr Adamczyk – it is thanks to them that, as I write these words, I can look at my little miracle sleeping peacefully beside me in his crib.

Thank you from the bottom of our hearts. You are wonderful.