January 2009, we saw our longed-for two lines on the test, we couldn’t have been happier. My first visit to a doctor - a visit on which I was supposed to hear “Congratulations, you are pregnant”. Instead, what I heard was “No pulse, the foetus died, please report to the hospital”. I could not describe what I felt at that time, my despair was immense, and my hospitalisation was another trauma, as I stayed with pregnant women in one room.
At that time, our fight for happiness started - our fight for a baby. Dozens of doctors recommended by our friends, a myriad of different tests that we had to take, numerous treatments that were supposed to help. Each successive failed treatment deepened our despair. If it were not for my husband’s support, I don’t know if I would have made it. All those years of trying to have a baby was a huge test for our relationship. A test we passed with an excellent result, I can say. Although I must admit that there were times of doubt whether our struggle made sense.
At some point, we decided to take a rest from all this. No more doctors, no more tests, we can’t go on like this. Our life was determined by the fight for a baby, we were tired. After all, there is adoption, there are so many children who need love, but… I will never be pregnant, I will not feel the baby move, I will not be walking proudly with my growing tummy. This is so shallow, but I wanted it so much. We tried to make peace with it, but it is not so easy to say STOP, THAT’S IT, there are other ways… In the end, not everyone has to be parents.
We had a year of break from the struggle, until our friends came to visit - they had been trying to have a baby for many years. One glance and I knew… THEY WERE GOING TO HAVE TWINS… I was so happy for them, and so jealous at the same time. They were the ones that told us about the Klinika Bocian in faraway Białystok (it’s a long way from home for us). We made our decision… we are going. They made it, why couldn’t we? That was the best decision in our life.
During our first visit, we met Dr Mrugacz, who read the history of our treatment and prescribed several tests, after which he said that IVF was the only chance for us to get what we wanted. We decided to fight this one last time. After completing all the formalities, we went to Białystok to start the entire procedure. 8 eggs were collected from me, 4 of which were successfully fertilised.
After each transfer, when after 14 days the Beta hCG result showed that it was all good, and the result was growing, so was our hope that this time we would succeed. The first three attempts were unfortunately unsuccessful, our nerves were tense, and depression close.
Someone friendly said something beautiful: “I know you’re sad, but I’m sure your baby is the one that is still waiting in the refrigerator. I have a theory that your purpose is to have that one child, it’s just that the doctor chose the embryos in the wrong order.” And you know…that was true. The last embryo, our last chance for a baby, AND WE MADE IT.
Of course, the whole pregnancy was a great joy, but at the same time a great fear - whether we would make it this time, whether the baby was healthy, whether the pregnancy would hold. Under the care of Dr Adamczyk, everything went perfectly well.
Our bundle of joy was born on 28.11.2017, after 10 long years of fighting. The name of our happiness is Franciszek.
The lesson that comes from this story: YOU SHOULD NEVER GIVE UP BUT FIGHT FOR SUCCESS. You have to believe that, just like us, you will eventually find angels like the midwives, nurses and doctors from the Klinika Bocian. Dr Mrugacz, Dr Pietrzycki, Dr Adamczyk - it is thanks to them that I am now looking at my little miracle that is sleeping next to my bed in a cot.
Thank you with all our hearts, you are wonderful.